According to Orthodox teaching, man has a two-fold nature, consisting of a material, visible body, and an immaterial, invisible soul. As St Symeon the New Theologian writes,  “...only man  was created by God as a double creature, having a body comprised of  the four elements, sensation, and breath, and a spiritual, immaterial, and bodiless soul inexpressibly and in an unfathomable way united to the body.”

Of the two components of man, body and soul, the soul is incomparably more important and superior. St Basil the Great writes: “The self is the inner man. The outer parts are not the self, but belongings of it.”

One’s true self is not the visible body, but the inner being, the spiritual man.  It is the soul that vivifies, nurtures, and makes the body to move and to sense.  Without the soul, the body is dead, motionless, and senseless.  The soul holds the body together. Despite this influence on the body, the soul is essentially independent from the body.  Its existence does not depend on the body, while the body, separated from the soul, dies.  It is the soul which gives the body life and holds it  together. The bond between the body and the soul is very difficult to dissolve.

The traumatic dissolution of the bond between the body and the soul is called death.   With the help of an Angel of God, at the time of death, the soul departs from the body.

We are taught that after the body and soul separate, and the body is buried in the ground, one’s soul continues its existence. Between the time of the death of the individual and the general resurrection - when everyone’s soul will be reunited to a new, resurrected body and we will stand before Christ to be judged - we are taught that the soul feels, to some incomplete degree, either the joy of the saints or the pain of hell (which makes sense in that the complete person, both body and soul, is not “present”).  After the general resurrection, we will feel either the full pain of hell or the total joy of the saints.

It is very important then, that we should use our time here on earth to follow the path of salvation that God has shown to us.  We must use our life to prepare for the judgment seat that every living being will experience, when they stand before Christ at their death.  Consequently, the time immediately before our death is perhaps the most important time in our life.

The Time Before Death

Should one find that they are seriously ill or about to die, their first action should be to receive the Mysteries of Confession and the Eucharist.  It is very important not to wait until the last minute, when one may be on a respirator and cannot talk, or is already unconscious.  
One cannot confess or commune unless they are conscious and confession also requires a person to be relatively coherent.

The remission of sins we receive through a good, honest and open confession is much more important than all the pain-killers in the world, for it is one of the only things which can keep us from the eternal pain of hell.  In turn, we are taught that Holy Communion is the “medicine of immortality”.  The union with Christ which we receive through partaking of the Body and Blood of our Lord in the Eucharist is that which gives us peace of mind and comfort in the difficult task of making our final farewells to our loved ones and in the terrible moment of death.

It must be emphasized that the Holy Mysteries are not to be looked upon with desperation as a miracle cure or as magic, that the priest will show up, say some special words, sprinkle some “magic” water or oil and the person will magically be transformed from a sinner into a saint and will go straight to heaven.

The main reason the priest should be called to the bedside of someone who is suffering from a grave illness is that these Holy Mysteries are a chance, perhaps the final chance, for repentance.  Repentance is a conscious renunciation of the devil and all service to him, a renunciation of all our sinful acts, and a heartfelt promise to God to change our sinful way of life.  This is why it is extremely important that the priest be called when the sick person is still conscious, coherent, and able to make a good confession and able to receive the Mysteries with faith.  The priest cannot repent for anyone other than himself, and to expect the priest to “do something” for a person who is unconscious or under the effects of painkillers is difficult at best.

It cannot be emphasized enough that if anyone is gravely sick or in danger of death, they should partake of Confession and Communion as soon as possible.  These Holy Mysteries are the sign of a Christian life (which is why as an absolute bare minimum we must approach at least once a year, and ideally as frequently as possible), and they are likewise the mark of a Christian death.

If one is gravely ill, a priest should also be called to serve the Mystery of Holy Unction.  The beautiful prayers of this service are for the remission of sins and the healing of the body and soul of the person being anointed.  It is a service for those who wish to get well, not those about to die.  Upon being informed of a serious illness, ask the priest to serve this Mystery as soon as possible, while we are still strong enough to join our prayers to the prayers of the Church.

We must remember that it is never too late to repent - and God wishes everyone to be saved.  No matter who is dying, no matter what their sins are, whether public or private, we are taught that true repentance and reconciliation to the Church through the Holy Mysteries will bring salvation.  This is the reason that we should never wait until the last minute to call the priest, and why we especially should not be afraid to call the priest to the bedside of anyone who is gravely ill for fear of “traumatizing” the patient.

As Orthodox Christians, it is vitally important to partake of  these three services: Confession and Communion, Holy Unction, and the Prayers at the Parting of the Soul.  We must be reminded amid this secular society, that these services offer real benefit for those gravely ill and at the threshold of the soul’s departure.  

Living as we do in a death-denying society and perhaps with non-Orthodox family members, we tend to avoid speaking about death or admitting that our loved ones may be dying.  It is unfortunate that many (even Orthodox people) around us fear the topic of death and do not understand what our life on earth truly is.  It may be up to us, as pious Orthodox Christians to guide them and teach them through our participation in the Holy Mysteries described above as well as the prayers of the Orthodox Church.

What if we need to call the priest  to the deathbed of someone he does not know, someone who is not Orthodox, or someone who has left the Church?  We understand that Confession, Communion, and Unction are Holy Mysteries of the Church, and as such are not to be performed for non-Orthodox, nor for those who have consciously denied the Faith.  What can the priest do?  He can help us to pray.  Through our prayers the errant Orthodox may return to the Faith through Confession and Communion before their death and for non-Orthodox, a priest can offer his prayers and petitions for God’s mercy on their souls.

At The Time of Death

When a person is dying, the priest is called for.  A Canon of Supplication is served, asking that the soul be parted from the body and escorted by angels to the throne of God.  These prayers also petition God to forgive the sins and grant a peaceful death to the one who is dying, permitting their soul to separate from their body peacefully.

Immediately after a person has died, if the priest is at hand, a short litya for the newly departed takes place.  If the priest is not at hand at the time of death, he should be called immediately.  Even if he cannot be at the bedside of the newly departed, he can begin the Canon of Supplication where he is as quickly as possible.  These prayers for the act of dying are of great aid for the one leaving this world.  Parishioners should request this Canon without fail.

 Arrangements should be made to have the loved one commemorated at the Divine Liturgy for 40 days.  It is best to call one of the monasteries that has a Liturgy every day and have them begin the commemoration at once; especially since most parish churches cannot have Liturgies for 40 days straight.

Preparing For the Funeral

The priest will help you to determine a funeral date, but consider the following rules:  Burials are usually not celebrated on Sundays during the year.  The body is not  brought into the temple on that day, except toward evening.  Burials are not celebrated on the Twelve Great Feasts of the Year as well as on the Patronal feast of the Church.  Burials are not celebrated on Great and Holy Friday, Great and Holy Saturday and Pascha.  The body is usually not brought into the temple on those days.

Embalming is a custom which has become common in the west, but it has no religious significance at all for the Orthodox. In fact, as far as the Church is concerned, embalming is not necessary.  There may be specific requirements for the burial of unembalmed remains however, such as burial within 48 hours after death, for example.  These concerns can best be answered by the funeral home chosen.  To most completely reflect the teaching of the Church, that our bodies literally “return to the earth from which they were created”, our departed only need a coffin, a grave, and a priest.

The casket that is chosen, from the standpoint of the Church, should be simple and need not be expensive.  Understand that you may choose a more expensive model, but it is not necessary.  Perhaps the money saved in using a less expensive model, can be offered in charity in the name of the reposed.

Some cemeteries require the purchase of a burial vault, or liner, which is a concrete sarcophagus into which the casket is placed.

Occasionally one sees various things put into the casket with the remains of the deceased - things of religious, sentimental, or historical value, etc.  According to Orthodox practice a Cross should be placed in the hand of the deceased, and an icon of the Resurrection is placed either on their chest or on the corner of the casket for the veneration of the faithful.  Sometimes photographs, military medals, or other sentimental items are included.

Under no circumstances however, should items which have an overtly non-Christian content or symbolism be placed in the casket of a deceased member of the Church.  As Christians we regard everything as important - but we especially strive to be surrounded (in death as in life) with that which is of God, of the Church, or that which reflects the Heavenly Kingdom and our hope for eternal blessedness.  For this reason things like “dream catchers”, rabbit’s feet, or Masonic regalia which reflect superstitious, pagan or even anti-Christian beliefs are absolutely unacceptable.

If at all possible, the body of the departed should be washed and honorably prepared for burial by members of the Church congregation.  Request this of your funeral home.  The departed should be dressed in decent clothing and an icon placed by their hands which will remain in the coffin during the funeral service.  A Cross may be provided by the funeral home.  This Cross is not left in the coffin but given to the relatives after the closing of the casket, before burial.

After the body is prepared, a “Panikida” (memorial) service is sung on the eve of burial.  This service can be done at the funeral home or ideally, within the nave of the Church temple.
 

The Viewing

After the Panikida Service, the body remains for “the viewing” within the nave of the temple.  It is important that during this time, a proper atmosphere be maintained.  Those who wish to pray should be able to do so.  Joking, laughing, and worldly conversation having nothing to do with the deceased or their family, should be done not in the presence of the deceased and family, but in another room or outside.

Our traditional custom is to read from the Book of Psalms during the “viewing.”  Ideally there will be a number of members of the faithful and the family who would volunteer to do so, perhaps under the direction of the cantor, so that God’s Word will constantly be heard by those present as it is being heard by the soul of the deceased.  This is a most beautiful and moving custom for those who are able to participate.

The Funeral Service

On the day of burial, the body is brought into the temple (or is already there if “the viewing” and Psalm reading have gone on overnight).  The Funeral Matins is celebrated in the temple on the day of burial.  In principle, the Funeral Matins may stand alone and does not require the celebration of Divine Liturgy.  Should the Divine Liturgy be celebrated on the day of the burial, Orthodox family members and friends should be notified of such, so as to be prepared to receive Holy Communion. Remember that Divine Liturgy cannot be served during the season of Great Lent and at other times as called for.  Your priest will advise you.

The Orthodox funeral service is properly served in the Church itself - the custom of serving the funeral only from the funeral home is not traditional, nor desirable.  This is especially true in the case of our devoted members who spent their entire life in and with the Church.  It is important that no one decide to have the funeral served in the funeral home only out of “convenience.”

Occasionally there may be a real need to do so - because infirm family members cannot access the Church, because the deceased lived very far away from the Church, etc - but this is definitely exceptional.  Having the funeral served in the Church beautifully reflects our belief that the Church is composed of both the living and the dead, and that as we part in the earthly heaven (the Church), we hope to be united in the true heaven, where we will worship God face-to-face.

The Western religious custom of having a “closed casket funeral” is absolutely not an Orthodox Christian concept.  The order of service is quite clear - the casket should be open during the funeral.  There is a whole series of rites in the funeral service dealing with the remains of the person:  they are to be blessed with Holy Water and annointed with Holy Oil, the “vinchyk” (garland) may be placed on the forehead of the deceased, the absolution prayer is read directly over the body of the deceased, and at the end of the service, all the faithful proceed forward to give a final kiss to the departed.  None of this is possible with the casket closed.

While there occasionally might be the real necessity to have the coffin closed (if someone has died and lain undiscovered for several days, for example), in this case it is still important that the priest be called to bless the remains before the coffin is closed.

Before the coffin is closed and taken to the cemetery for burial, the faithful are given an opportunity to come forward and kiss the departed one last time.  It must be clearly underlined that this is not the time to extend condolences to the family.  It is the time to say farewell to the mortal remains of the departed.  Traditionally this is done by kissing the icon of Christ on the garland (on the forehead) of the deceased.  During the time of the final kiss, the prescribed verses are sung, and they should continue to be sung until all present, ending with the family, have made their farewells.  This is a very powerful moment and a very strong statement of our belief.

One particular aspect of the funeral which is unduly influenced by a western Christian and secular approach to funeral rites is the custom of lay people delivering eulogies.  In the Orthodox Church it is forbidden for those not in orders (not to mention non-Orthodox) to preach or speak from the amvon (pulpit) during the holy services, and that our funeral service begins with “Blessed is our God...” and ends with the interment.  Consequently, if there are members of the family or community who wish to deliver a eulogy, this is done either over the grave at the conclusion of the service, or at the Memorial Meal following the interment.

The Interment

The order of service is very clear in stating that at the cemetery the body is to be buried - i.e., to be placed into the grave.  The custom of leaving the coffin or vault above the ground for the graveside service and not interring it until the family and the mourners have left does not reflect our practice or our Faith, and should be avoided.  After all, what is an interment when nothing has been interred?  During the singing of the Litia at the grave, the body should be lowered into the earth, the priest then throws the first shovelful of earth into the grave, and the grave is then filled in.

The actual filling in of the grave, while not impossible, is in most current circumstances very difficult to do in an edifying manner - either a back-hoe must move the earth from the mound, or trucks must actually drive up to deposit the earth into the grave.  But even if the grave is not filled in with everyone present to witness, at least everyone should see the casket lowered into the ground, and have the opportunity to throw a handful of earth into the grave.

The Memorial Luncheon

One of the most important traditions we have in regard to the funeral is the memorial luncheon afterwards.  We should again remember that the meal should reflect our Faith and the teachings of our Church.  If the meal takes place on a Wednesday, Friday, or during a fasting period, it should be “fast-worthy”.  There is no excuse in this day and age, when all types of very delicious, fast-worthy foods are readily available.  We would not expect to go to a Jewish or Moslem meal and be served pork, nor would we expect to be served meat at a Buddhist meal, so perhaps all the non-Orthodox guests who attend our funeral luncheons should see that the Orthodox take their Faith seriously too!

Among Greek Orthodox people, fish is always served as the course at all repasts during the year

Therefore, It is the custom to have a meal after the funeral service and to invite those at the funeral to attend.  In the Christian tradition, this meal was called “A Mercy Meal”.  It was the occasion to invite the poor and needy people to a meal as an act of mercy or almsgiving, done in the name of the departed one, for the benefit of his or her soul.  Nowadays, there is very little to this meal that has to do with charity.  Usually meals are prepared by a caterer, with no funds or food given to the needy.  Therefore, it is perhaps best we do not refer to such meals as “mercy meals”.  Nonetheless, it is honorable and wise to make offerings to the poor, the Church, charitable organizations, etc., at the time of death of a loved one, for the benefit of their soul.

After the Funeral

A Panikida, or Memorial Service is usually offered for the newly departed prior to the Funeral Matins, often the day before burial.  It is the custom to celebrate the funeral on the 3rd day, and have the memorial services on the 9th and 40th day since death.  The day of death is counted as the first day.  The service should be celebrated on the eve of the day or the morning of the day.  For example, if the 40th day is Tuesday the 23rd, the memorial should be celebrated Tuesday morning or afternoon, but in the evening on Monday the 22nd.  This practice of commemoration is because the day begins in the evening.  Memorial Services may be offered at any time of the year for the departed, usually on the anniversary of death, Namesday, Birthday, etc.  Memorial Services are usually not celebrated on any of the Twelve Great Feasts, Sundays nor during Great and Holy Week, nor again during Bright Week.  Memorial Services are offered for Orthodox Christians.  Non-Orthodox Christians may have prayers said for them but not the usual Memorial Service or Panikida.
 

SPECIAL CONSIDERATIONS

Non-Orthodox & Marginal Members

What do we do in the case of the burial of those who are only marginally members of the Church - those who attend services infrequently if at all, do not support the Church, do not commune, and perhaps are not even really believers?  It is probably better not to serve such a funeral in Church because doing so might be perceived to reflect a degree of hypocrisy both on the part of the Church, and of the deceased. (“He/she did not bother to darken the door of the Church when alive, so why would they want to be buried from the Church.”)  Again, we must understand that Christian death simply reflects Christian life.

Non-Communicant Orthodox members (that is: people identifying themselves as Orthodox, who may have attended Church services in life and even supported the church financially, but who willfully did not receive Holy Communion at all), are usually not brought into the temple upon their death.  By refusing the Eucharist, which is the sacrament of Church membership, and membership as a sacrament, they have refused as well to “proclaim the Lord’s death and confess His resurrection” (1 Cor 11:26) - which is the very content of the Liturgy of Death and or Orthodox Christian Life.

We occasionally have situations occur concerning someone’s death which are out of the ordinary.  Under normal circumstances, the Church would insist on a minimum set of conditions for Christian burial to take place - for example: 1)  the deceased should be a member in good standing of the Orthodox Church, having received the Holy Mysteries of Baptism, Chrismation, and the Eucharist; 2)  the remains should be buried, not cremated, as cremation has never been an accepted practice of the Church.

Suicide

Like non-communicant members, (which is a form of suicide), suicide itself remains a profound tragedy and sin that should elicit from the community of faith a deep prayer for forgiveness, repentance and sorrow - for the sake of the suicide and for the members of the church as well.

The Orthodox Church normally denies Church burial to a person who has committed suicide.  However, a special pastoral consideration may allow a determination to be made, in consultation with the Bishop, to permit a service for burial, usually from the funeral home.  Such a determination has, as its goal, to build up the community of faith, and not lead to scandal or confusion.

Cremation

The witness of how the Body of our Lord Jesus Christ was treated, as well as that of the Holy Theotokos, the ever-virgin Mary makes clear the honor, respect and love given to the human body.  The holy relics - the physical remains of the saints - reveal that the body, even after the soul has left it, is to be considered with due honor and may at times be incorruptible.  Cremation has never been a practice of the Christian Church and it is forbidden. Christians adopted the Old Testament custom of giving the deceased over to the earth.  Burial expresses our faith that the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and that we live in the hope of Resurrection from the dead, according to the image of Christ, Who was buried (not cremated). Cremated remains are not to be brought into the temple for services or for any other reason.  Funeral services over cremated remains are forbidden.  Cremated remains may be buried with the singing of “Holy God.”

Some issues, i.e., the burial of non-Orthodox, services over cremated remains or services for those who have committed suicide are of an exceptional nature, and are normally determined not by the parish priest, but by the local bishop.  It is very important to understand that the position of the Church is not “judgmental”, consigning people to hell for not following the dictates of the Church, but rather is pastoral.
 

The Burial of Masons

Upon the death of a freemason, the family of the departed must choose between Masonic services and Orthodox Christian burial.  If a Masonic service is chosen, the body is not to be brought into the temple and the priest may not celebrate any service at all - except to commit the body to the grave (if he is asked to do so) with the singing of “Holy God.”
If a Masonic service is not chosen and the body is not bedecked with Masonic or other non-Christian ritual clothing or objects, the priest may celebrate the Liturgy of Death.

This position is taken because Masonic services do not specifically mention, proclaim, or confess Jesus Christ, Son of God, dead and risen, as being the only answer and Victor over death.  Neither do they proclaim the resurrection of all flesh as being God’s plan for us.  Nor do they function to incorporate the death of the departed into the death of Christ - the only way death can be overcome.  Rather, they presuppose a doctrine of spiritual immortality and tend to view the disconnection of soul and body as the natural end of life.  This is not a biblical teaching: a soul-less body and a body-less soul, are not natural.  Death is the sign and fruit of sin, and the mutilation of the human person.

Needless to say, immediately following the death of a loved one is not the best time to try to explain to people the “why’s and wherefore’s” of the Church’s teaching on things like cremation, suicide or sin.  If at all possible these matters should be dealt with and discussed (during sermons, Bible studies, private meetings, etc) publicly and regularly so that the faithful are aware of the issues involved.  It should also be stressed that, without question, no matter what happens, any good priest will do his best to serve the needs of the bereaved without compromising the teachings of the Church.

Autopsies and Organ Donations

Autopsies and donations of bodily organs after death may be done as long as respectful care is exercised toward the body.  In a broad sense, all Christian bodies, as anointed temples of the Holy Spirit, are “relics” and they are organic components of the wholeness of human personhood.  On the body of each man without exception lies the imprint of the image and likeness of God

After the Funeral

Everyone of us who desires to manifest his love for the departed and give them real help, can do this best of all through prayer for them, and in particular by commemorating them at the Divine Liturgy.  Here, particles of bread are cut out for the living and the dead and let fall into the Blood of the Lord with the words: “Wash away O Lord, the sins of those here commemorated by Thy precious Blood, through the prayers of Thy Saints.”

We can do nothing better or greater for the dead than to pray for them, offering commemoration for them at the Divine Liturgy.  Of this, they are always in need, and especially during the 40 days when the soul of the deceased is proceeding on its path to the eternal habitations.  The body feels nothing then:  it does not see its close ones who have assembled, does not smell the fragrance of the flowers, does not hear the funeral sermon.  But the soul senses the prayers offered for it and is grateful to those who make them and is spiritually close to them.

Do then for the ones you love, what is best.  Do for them what is needful for them and what is within your power.  Use your money not for outward adornment of the coffin and the grave, but in order to help those in need, in memory of your loved ones who have died; for churches where prayers are offered for them.  Show mercy to the dead and take care of their souls.  

Offering Memorials

After the bodies of our loved ones are in a place of rest, we continue to commemorate them and offer memorials on their behalf.  The practice of remembering the dead during the preparation of the Holy Eucharist was established by the Holy Apostles.  In addition to these memorial prayers, days set aside for memorials have been observed since Old Testament times.  We pray for both the Church Militant (those alive) and the Church Triumphant (those asleep in the Lord).  Both constitute the one, indivisible and united Church of Christ.

The Church cares for all Christians in death.  She prays for them and offers the Bloodless Sacrifice of the Divine Liturgy in their behalf on the third, the ninth, and the fortieth day after their repose.  In addition to these we have an annual memorial on the day the reposed fell asleep in the Lord.

On the third day we pray to Christ, who rose from the dead on the third day after His death, that He may resurrect our departed into a life of blessedness.  On the ninth day we pray that the Lord may number our departed among the nine orders of Angels and Saints.  On the fortieth day we beseech our Savior Jesus Christ that He, who endured temptation from the devil on the fortieth day of His fast, may help our departed to stand the ordeal of God’s judgement without being shamed.  We also ask Him, who ascended to Heaven on the fortieth day, to receive our departed into the heavenly abode.  By devoting to prayer the anniversary day of our beloved’s death, we express our belief that the day of man’s death is not the day of his annihilation, but of his birth into life everlasting.

Also, the 3-month, the 6-month and the 9-month memorials symbolize the Holy Trinity, the God of all. 

Saturdays in our Church Calendar

The aforementioned memorial days are for specific people.  The Church, in its wisdom, has set aside Saturday (the Sabbath) to be a day of commemoration of the holy Martyrs and of all the deceased.  

Even Christ the Lord lay dead on the Sabbath Day, “resting from all his works” and “trampling down death by death.”  Thus, in the New Testament Church of Christ, Saturday becomes the proper day for remembering the dead and for offering prayers for their eternal salvation.

On Memorial Saturdays the liturgical hymns pray universally for all the departed, and the Matins for the dead, is served with specific mention of the deceased by name.  Litanies and prayers are also added to the Divine Liturgy at which the scripture readings refer to the dead and their salvation in Christ.

The Meaningful Custom of Kollyva

At the sacred Memorials, as we know, Kollyva (boiled wheat) is offered, a practice which can be traced to the middle of the fourth century.  Bread and wine with olives and cheese or rice were offered in Memorials of earlier times.  The offering of these gifts served the purpose of charity, and those who partook of them would pray: “Blessed be his memory”.  This is why they were called Mecariae (blessings), and had their origin at the meals or the funeral meals of which the Apostolic Constitutions speak.  A continuation of that ancient custom are the luncheons and the coffee offered today by the relatives of the deceased to those who prayed with them at the Service of the sacred Memorial.

Other Offerings of Remembrance

Though not a requirement of the Church, the faithful often offer financial donations in the name of the reposed loved one on the memorial days of commemoration.  This custom derives from the early practice of distributing the wealth of the deceased among the poor.  Today we sometimes gift the Church with a financial contribution in the name of the deceased.  The Church takes the contribution and places it in an area of ministry where it will do the most charitable good.  
 

In closing, one very important point must be made.  Every one of  us is dying.  We are closer to death now than we were when we began reading this pamplet.  Our whole life should be a preparation for a “Christian ending” to our life.  None of us knows when we will die, but we do know that those who are always prepared stand a better chance of blessedness than those who constantly postpone their preparation.  While it is good for someone to repent on their deathbed, it is even better to make repentance a way of life.
 

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